A good different

I might be stating the obvious, but men and women are different.

And we really don't seem to understand each other very well.

I'm not saying no two people of the opposite gender can "get" one another, but, let's be honest, our minds simply function in different ways. And this doesn't seem to change with age.

At the grocery store recently, I overheard a conversation between a little girl and her mother, and I got a little chuckle out of what was said. Mom: "You're gonna be asking a boy to be your Valentine, Lacie. Ooooooh!" Lacie: "No! No! Gross!" Mom: "Sweetie, you need to be nice. Don't talk like that—boys are not gross. They're just...different."

You can say that again.

I accidentally said that out loud as I walked past them, and the mom just looked at me and smiled. We both get that we don't get it.

Then yesterday, while I was finishing my run at the lake, I passed two women walking and heard one say, "What is wrong with guys?!" I accidentally said, "Nothing and everything" as I ran by them (clearly I need to learn to tame my tongue and not butt into people's conversations). I was just adding on an extra half-mile, so I had to turn back around and pass them again, and I was able to hear another comment from the temporary man-hater: "I just don't understand him. What's wrong with me?"

Obviously I didn't get to finish the conversation with these ladies, but I imagine her friend comforted her and assured her that there is nothing wrong with her—he's the one with the problem.

Or maybe he's just not that into her.

Men typically don't carry gold bags.

I think one of the biggest issues is that men and women express themselves differently. And, though we don't always like to admit it, women tend to read into things way more than necessary. He didn't compliment your haircut? Well, he probably didn't even notice it—you only got a trim. He didn't comment on that awesome picture you posted on Instagram? Umm, hello, you put it up during the Cowboys game. He didn't call you first thing Monday morning? He said "sometime next week." He didn't seem interested when you were giving him the latest recap of Pretty Little Liars? How can anyone who doesn't watch that show really be that intrigued? From witnessing many relationships between people around me, it's become quite apparent that guys are not mind readers. At all.

And sometimes women try to be mind readers but aren't very good at it.

Because I really don't think a guy's mind is something that should be read. It might be too scary.

What I think is so wonderful, though, is when two people learn to understand each other simply by letting love rule. I look at my parents and see two people who are completely opposite and probably think the other to be crazy at times. My mom is late everywhere she goes, while my dad is always freakishly early; my dad usually tries to use logic in most situations, while my mom is more of the whimsical, child-at-heart type of person who would rather be hopeful and imaginative; my dad likes to get things done as soon as possible, while my mom is the procrastinator submitting her kindergarten lesson plans at the very last moment; my dad will go hunting with his brother on occasion, while my mom is the one who yelled "Fly away, birds!" as loudly as she could the one time they actually let her tag along for the hunting trip.

I think they stopped trying to understand one another long ago, which actually helps them now to understand each other far too well.

As a high school teacher, I get the great joy of hearing the perspectives of both genders. This confirms my theory even further that guys and girls are wired with different ways of thinking. Again, I don't really want to know what goes on inside the male brain for the most part, but I know the female one pretty well. Are we irrational at times? Sure, but never. Do we overreact? Absolutely, but never. Could we be classified as insane every once in a while? Of course, but never. Are we slightly concerned with things that might not be that important? Maybe, but never.

Though God made us to be completely different people who don't always completely understand the other, He made us specifically for one another. Lacie will eventually learn that, while boys are certainly gross at times, she will grow to love them for the people they are. The woman walking around the lake on a Sunday morning knows that there is nothing wrong with her (or guys, I suppose), and whatever miscommunication or whatever it was she had with some guy is simply that, and she will be just fine.

The great thing is that we have a God who gets every single one of us and still loves us all unconditionally. When you find someone else who thinks you're crazy, irrational, and maybe even slightly insane—yet still loves you just the same—then you've truly got a gem. Kinda like Cory and Topanga.

And then the not understanding just becomes the understood.

Making time

You make time for the things and people you want to make time for in life.

This truth has become more and more significant in my life lately, and it's something I try to remind myself of on a daily basis.

Because some things are simply that important.

I love running. But I have to be at work each morning a little before 6, and I usually have much to do after the workday ends, so I wake up either at 3:02 or 3:29 a.m. every day so that I can get my run in before having to go to work. I make time for running, because I love it that much.

Life is full of so many events and tasks, and it's far too easy to get caught up in them and forget about finding joy outside of our own little objective-driven minds. After college, it seemed common to lose touch with old friends and become absorbed in the working world. When I started grad school and was teaching at the same time, I felt like I had no time for anything. I can think of multiple instances where I tried to make plans with people and wouldn't be able to find time or would have to cancel plans because there simply wasn't enough time in my schedule.

But you make time for the things and people you want to make time for in life.

This principle wasn't exactly engrained in my brain just yet, so I didn't really bother to think about how selfish I was or how much I was missing out on by not making time for some of the people who were supposed to matter most in my life. It can certainly be trying on friendships and family relationships. I can't imagine it would have been good if I had been dating anyone at the time, either.

The truth is, we weren't meant to walk this life alone. It's not only lonely and boring, but it's also just plain silly. I don't know how many people there are in this world—because it's obviously a number that's changing by the second—but I do know that there sure are a lot of others out there with whom we can be spending time and forming lasting relationships. Hearts filled with love are meant to be shared, not contained and stored away while we let self-ambitions keep us from what we're really meant to do in this world: love others.

Take time to make time.

Last month at the half in Dallas, my sister and a group of our friends woke up earlier than they normally would on a Sunday morning to come cheer for me. They couldn't stay super long after the race, because they were trying to make it to church on time, but it really meant a lot to me that they would give up time they could be using to sleep longer or use as extra get-ready time so that they could show me how much they cared for me.

Because you make time for the things and people you want to make time for in life.

During my first year of teaching, my dear friend and former college roommate Katie and I used to chat on the phone in the mornings before work every two weeks or so. She lives in Round Rock now, so we rarely get to see one another, but we still wanted to keep up with each other and maintain our friendship. Sure, there were mornings when one of us would call, and the other would obviously be scattered and trying to get stuff together for the day, but we would just put those stresses aside for a few minutes so that we could connect with a friend worth keeping. She's married and has a kiddo on the way now, but we still catch up as often as we can.

Because you make time for the things and people you want to make time for in life.

I understand that there are moments or events you simply physically cannot make happen because of conflicts, but there are other instances when things can be rearranged on your schedule. If you have to give up a much-anticipated afternoon nap because an old friend is in town and wants to grab coffee, save the sleep for later; if your baby sister is hosting a date auction, but you have somewhere you're supposed to be when it starts, leave your event early so that you can be there for her; if you feel like you're losing touch with someone important in your life, pick up the phone to make a call; if you have a group of friends who get together once a week just for fun and forgetting about the daily struggles life can bring us, make it a point to be there; if you make plans with someone, be where you say you are going to be; if someone asks you for a favor, set aside what you're doing for a bit to let love and selflessness dominate your heart; if it's a gorgeous day out, and you feel like you have a million errands or chores to do, make time to go for a walk, run, bike ride or to fly kites outside, instead; and spend time with people as much as you can.

Because you make time for the things and people you want to make time for in life.

We only get to live one life. What's the point in spending it doing things that either make us miserable or turn out to be nothing but tasks filled with self-driven motives? God doesn't place people in our lives by accident. They are there so we can love them and spend time with them. By making time for things and people who actually matter, we aren't wasting time—we're investing it and fulfilling it.

The one thing you have to ask yourself is what it is you want to make time for in life.

Let there be clouds

For some reason, I really love clouds.

I don't remember when my fascination with them began, but it was long, long ago. Somewhere along the line those huge white puffs in the sky caught my attention, and I have been intrigued ever since.

I understand that a lot of people aren't huge fans and prefer those days where you can look up to see "not a cloud in the sky," but, honestly, where is the fun in that?

Clouds make the sky better.

Clouds are wonderful, because, not only do they add a bit of character to the sky, but each one is so unique and different in its own way and allows people to use their imaginations more than they normally would. One person could look at a particular cloud and decide it's shaped like a castle, while another person may glance at that very same cloud and deem it broccoli, instead. I may see a giraffe in the sky, and you may think you're looking at the Eiffel Tower in the form of condensed water vapor. Regardless, it doesn't really matter, because there really isn't a wrong answer there. It's all part of your own unique ingenuity.

The wonders of the sky

Different clouds also carry various meanings and forecasts with them: nimbostratus clouds indicate light or moderate rain or snow; altostratus clouds contain ice crystals and water droplets and usually appear before storms; altocumulus generally form on humid summer mornings and forecast late afternoon thunderstorms; cirrocumulus (which are some of my favorites) are associated with pleasant weather and look a little like fish scales—they seriously make the sky look so magnificent; and cumulonimbus are fairly tall clouds that you probably don't want to see—they are good predictors of ugly storms and even tornadoes.

But clouds don't always stay the same.

One minute you may see the Sultan of Swat in a cloud and in the very next few seconds see it's turned into Simba—yet it's still the same cloud. In that regard, I think people are a lot like clouds. We are constantly changing so many things about us, yet we are essentially still the same people.

And people, like clouds, often get restless. Clouds are always on-the-go, never seeming to stay in the same sky you're seeing. They travel so quickly but still have the ability to impact each area they pass.

One thing I don't like, however, is when clouds cover the sun. I like it when the sun is shining with clouds in the same sky, but not when you can't see the sun. The sun beating down makes everything feel warmer, and it seems too dark and cold when the clouds try to take over completely. And you definitely don't want that when you're trying to read and soak up some rays on a hot summer day on your floaty in the pool.

But, when the sun breaks through those clouds, and they are both filling the sky with beauty, it's absolutely glorious.

Just like clouds, we need to let the Son shine through to fill this place with glory and wonder. If we try to do it all, it's going to be dark and cold, when what the world really needs is light and warmth. But, like clouds, we have great opportunities to impact others and be impacted, as well.

I think we could definitely all use a few more clouds in our lives.

Dip-dee-dos

Every once in a while, you're going to have to skip through those dip-dee-dos you encounter in life.

Last week, my mom and I went on a hike on a walking/biking trail near a lake while my dad biked. As we got closer to the end, my mom kept mentioning some dip-dee-dos that we were approaching. I honestly had no idea what she was talking about at first, so I just nodded and kept walking. (Bless her heart—my mom is precious, so I just let her make up her own words and go right along with it.) I mean, she was just trying to warn me about these miniature hills (if you can even call them that) that we would soon encounter, but I kinda just liked the fact that there was now something called a "dip-dee-do" out in the woods. Seemed exciting.

Then they appeared.

Dip-dee-dos

I almost had to laugh at all of my mother's admonitions. She had cautioned me multiple times about the dip-dee-dos, and they were really nothing more than little rolls and baby bunkers in the ground that were actually kind of fun. I intentionally picked up my speed and ran up and down them just to spice things up a bit. I suppose you might have to use more attentiveness if you were riding your bike over these things, but even then it wouldn't be that intimidating. Well, unless you were an ant, perhaps.

I think we treat many things in life similar to the expectations of the dip-dee-dos. We tend to make big deals out of things that really become rather anticlimactic—after all, the world didn't end a few weeks ago. We allow certain caveats from others or from our own crazy imaginations to get in the way of enjoying life as best we can. If my mom and I had tip-toed through the dip-dee-dos, I'm pretty sure it would have been one of the lamest walks those particular trails had ever seen. But, rushing through them added more entertainment and even brought in somewhat of the "stay forever young" advice that Rod Stewart once advised us all to do.

There are certainly dip-dee-dos in life that are larger than the ones we faced on the trails last week, but I think those have to be faced with the same fearless attitude. The more we look at mounds and hills as mountains we have to scale, the larger and more painful they are going to seem. And, even when we are up against peaks that seem like they are infinite heights, we have a God who is there to help us scale them—those things are even less than trail dip-dee-dos to Him.

Conquered them.

One significant fact about the dip-dee-dos is that they were essential for us to go through to get to where we needed to go. They were on our designated path, and the only logical option we had (besides attempting to create our own path and likely getting lost) was to tackle them head-on without any worry. That's what you have to do when you face situations that aren't exactly smooth surfaces: put on your soldier helmet and embrace the challenge of whatever stands in your way of making it to your final destination.

The dip-dee-dos are inevitably going to pop up along our paths, but we simply have to trust that we're strong enough to run through them like when you were a kid running through the sprinklers: fearlessly and with spirits of innocence and vigor.