Can't pierce this

It can be rather frustrating when you want things you can't have.

Like pierced ears.

When I was in kindergarten, my parents took both my younger sister and me to get our ears pierced. I'm allergic to a few random things (like Benadryl), and I scar and bruise rather easily. Not too long after what I thought was a life-changing night at Claire's Boutique, my piercings got infected, and I had to remove the earrings and let the holes grow over. But, when they did, little scar tissue bumps remained, and more than one dermatologist advised my parents not to try to pierce over them, or the tiny little bumps—you can't even see them—could become much worse.

I was devastated.

It was really upsetting growing up and never being able to wear earrings. I always thought it was so unfair that my sister didn't have as sensitive skin as I did, and her ears always looked so pretty. More than once, I received earrings as gifts from people, and I always gave them to her. I certainly had no use for them. I tried clip-ons—they hurt. I tried magnetic earrings—they never stayed on my ears, and I lost multiple pair. I tried stick-ons—they always ended up in my hair or vanished. So I finally reached a point where I realized I would forever have naked ears.

I love Tie and earrings

And I was quite sad about it.

I don't know why earrings are so appealing to me. I don't really wear a lot of jewelry, I don't own any makeup or even know the first thing about how to put it on, I don't really know much about fashion (anything matches if you wear it with confidence), but there's something about earrings that makes me wish I were able to wear them.

When I turned 18 my senior year of high school, against my parents' admonitions, I got the cartilage on my ear pierced. Skipper and precious Mare had warned me that the same thing would likely happen, leaving me with yet another scar tissue bump on my ear, but I chose not to listen. I was 18—I knew everything.

Sometimes I hate it when my parents are right.

Sure enough, that super awesome act of rebellion that I thought was so worth the risk left me with an ear that wouldn't stop bleeding and hurting until I let the piercing grow over and heal. But, just like in my first year of grade school, in my final year I was left with a bump on my ear that will remain forever. (This bump is worse than my first experience, but it is thankfully more hidden.)

It often surprises people when they find out my ears aren't pierced, and they don't always understand why I don't just try getting them pierced again, even after I attempt to explain my story. In fact, just the other day, a woman asked me about the name for a certain style of earrings, and I said I didn't know, because my ears aren't pierced. She looked at me incredulously and said, "Oh, honey, you really should change that."

But I can't.

I have a stuffed koala named Tie that I've had since my early days in elementary school, and I can't sleep without him. I once drove more than 30 miles to spend the night at my parents' house, realized I forgot Tie and turned around and drove all the way home to get him before going back to my parents'. He's that worth it. Tie has a bow tie that won't stay tied—that's how he got his name—and he has this one piece of stitching that has been dangling from his neck ever since I got him. He also has a discolored spot on his nose that has always served as a reminder of his imperfections.

But I love every single thing about him.

I could have easily found him a better bow tie or had the stitching fixed or painted over his nose, but if I did that then he wouldn't be my Tie. Those perfect little imperfections make him him.

You don't have to be in pristine condition to be a treasured stuffed animal, and I don't think you have to wear earrings to be treasured, either. Just like I adore Tie and would not change a thing about him, I know God values His children—and the changes He wishes to make are matters of the heart and not of the ears. You're that worth it. I know it's hard sometimes not to wish we had things that we might not, but it's important to be able to find joy in those things we actually do have. You are the person you are for a reason, and you are not in the place in life you are without purpose. It's not the best idea to try to force things to happen that aren't meant to happen.

Trust me, you don't want to end up with another bump on your ear.